Friday, June 30, 2006

You just never know what challenges lie ahead

Ok. I'm tired of watching television, and I can't seem to get into books, as I'm often drowsy, but I've watched a lot of HGTV, TLC, Bravo, dancing shows, talent shows, talk shows, celebrity reporting...you name it.

My sisters Carolyn and Marsha have been taking good care of me the last few days, being at my beckon call (or beck and call however you are supposed to say that). They, along with my kids, have made sure that I've had meals, clean clothes, and a clean house, and good conversation. In addition, my sister (in law) Karen took a lot of time and love to make many meals that have been frozen and await heatin. She claims she 'isn't the world's greatest cook', but take my word for it, the food is delicious and very much appreciated.

A funny thing happened when Carolyn was here, though, when I decided I wanted some fresh air and took the Amigo out to take the dog out, and a storm was moving in. There was a lot of thunder and as I was hurrying the dog and motor-scootering from tree cover to tree cover and I realized that wasn't too safe, so I came in. I figured I have been getting every complication that I could possibly have and that somewhere above, where challenges are metered out, there just might be one more for Lynne that said: "strike by lightening". I haven't had that one yet, and with MY luck I might. So I scootered in quickly, and made it in safetly.

whew!

(humor, in case it isn't perfectly clear) :D

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Cellulitis

Been in the hospital for a few days with cellulitis in my feet, particularly the right one. I'm home now, lazing on my sofa, with people taking care of me.

It's always something....each week a new challenge.

But I'm hanging in... and holding on.

send love and hugs

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

wireless router

Still feeling quite tired after last week's chemo. Not sure which of the myriad of things is making me so tired, so I just rest as needed.

I feel as if I'm not doing a good job manning the blog, but haven't had the desire to sit here and write. If only I could get my wireless to work! I can't make my router work, and therefore I can't use my laptop while I'm resting watching tv.

I just don't get it, because it worked at Jill's house! I may give it another try.

Monday, June 19, 2006

try this link

http://www.lulu.com/NewLeaf

Hopefully the link is working correctly, as the book is finally ready!

I am excited, and hope you all enjoy this. It is a 9x7 paperback version of What in the World is a Pogo?

Hardcover to come.

Friday, June 16, 2006

Treatment

went fine...I'm very tired, so I'm going to bed. My glucose levels are screwed up from having to take the steroid for the treatment, but I know it will level out again... I imagine that I will have to deal with this every treatment time, and what can I do.


I just have to say I am so tired of being sick. I need a nice fun, life focus. hmm. A vacation. Too bad I have no frickin money for one. Trying to get to TC, need to figure that out. My biggest obstacle for that is how to take my Amigo, I have no way to transport it. I need a carry-thing and a trailer hitch, but again....no frickin money.

I'll make a wish and maybe when I wake up in the morning there will be lots of money under my pillow, my sickness will be gone, I will be in a lovely lakeside home, I'll have someone to take care of me (and visa versa), and the past 2 years will be just a dream.


huh.
right

nite

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

I feel like me again.

It feels as if I've weathered this latest crisis. My blood glucose numbers are returning to normal, my strength has mostly returned. Only my ankles are swollen, but I guess that will improve as well. They were swollen before the latest crisis, so maybe they will never be quite normal. I'm anxious for that to resolve so I will feel like a safe driver. I haven't driven my car in 3 weeks, and I want to make sure that I have strong movement back and forth between pedals before I take that on.

I probably will use crutches always, and I've accepted that likelihood. I nap every day, but so do my favorite creatures: my pets. Can't be all bad. Might be why they are so relaxed and happy all the time.

I'm not looking forward to another chemo treatment Friday, but I can do it. It's part of my job. I am ready to get back to living. A trip to TC must happen soon! When is that Cherry Festival, anyway? I'd enjoy a parade, and a Friday Night Live, but if I go, it will have to be on my Amigo, and I admit, I am embarassed to have my friends see me on it. I have to get over that. I see strong people accomplishing many things in wheelchairs, and I never ever think they should be ashamed. I admire those that really live their lives fully. I can navigate a little on crutches. I can go to restaurants if I am able to park closely, but anything beyond a small walk I need the Amigo.

That's what's happening for me at the moment.

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Not Much

new to report, I am continuing to have decreasing glucose numbers, nap a lot, and have fat ankles. Beautiful weather here, a lovely day, even if I didn't run barefoot through the park.

Pogo snuggied with me while I napped, Jill did my laundry, and I propped my feet, trying to get them higher than my heart....but that is not easy! I really can't do it, how could anyone? I'm not a gymnast, afterall.

I'll report more when there's more to report.... thanks for all your good thoughts.

Saturday, June 10, 2006

Missed it by 11

Today, I had 3 blood glucose tests that were normal. I was rooting and hoping for 4, but my bedtime check was 11 points over what is the lowest measure on my sliding scale. It means I only had to take insulin once! And that my body is doing its best to make the appropriate amount on its own. Is't it a miracle the way it works when things go as planned? I will be curious about tomorrow.

Thursday, June 08, 2006

Friday Update

For those who need a bit of info before the weekend, I'm doing well. My glucose numbers are about the same as they were earlier in the week, I want to see them all at normal in an instant, but oh well.

I'm cranky about my latest proof. It was NOT fixed. grrrrr

So I've notified them and have to see what they say. So no book this week, hopefully next.

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

I'll read this tomorrow and wonder what got into me.

There's something that people say, when assessing there possessions, or assembling their gratitude. They say they are grateful for their health. I know they mean it when they say it, but they don't really know what they mean when they say it. They don't know that even when they say they don't take it for granted, they do take it for granted. They can't know. I didn't know. You don't know how healthy you were until you aren't. I didn't know. I have been healthy my entire life. I have never had a major illness or operation, never had to even think about taking medications other than thyroid meds. I've never been interested in alcohol or drugs, however mild. It just never occurred to me. I loved being strong and healthy. I loved exercising. I liked to bike and watch my thighs pump the pedals. I felt proud and strong to be so healthy. (oh oh tears) I learned new skills: hiking, kayaking. I learned to load the kayak on my Jeep and I learned to paddle (it's not like a canoe)
The fact that I was otherwise healthy has likely been something that has enabled me to weather this cancer as well as I have.

But something is making me sad. I hear people around me saying they are sick. They are weak, or they are old, or they can't do something.

Over the last 2 weeks, because of the combination of undergoing a recent chemo treatment, developing dangerously high glucose levels, adding insulin to my body to counteract that, having 50% strength in my entire body, having 75% lower strength in my legs, having found myself on several occasions literally being unable to rise to a standing position (not too tired, not just weak, but physically unable to do it) I was slammed with a new sledgehammer. I understood what not having your health really means.

I would trade anyone their difficulties. (though I don't wish mine on them) They vary, I"m sure, some more serious and debilitating than others, but unless your doctors have used the "T" word (which I don't allow to be used around me by the way, so don't even think of it) then you are better off than I am, and I would take yours on and deal with the consequences.

I have a new view and new attitude on what is sick, what is old, and on what is health. I used to love that I was youthful in appearance, and didn't want to get old, or be a grandma any time soon. I hear people complain about white hair or wrinkles, and now I WANT them, I find true beauty in lovely old women with beautiful wrinkles and lovely white hair. (I didn't say I was going to stop dyiing mine!) ha ha But I find beauty in longevity, particularly when the aging is handled with grace.

I'd love to age. To NOT age means less time. More time, more age, more life to enjoy. The key is to find what you need to find in order to enjoy what you have, be truly grateful for you health, and not to take for granted life, health, family, brothers, sisters, wives, husbands, sons, daughters, pets, trees...... you get the picture....

I see people not loving other people
I see people not realizing their health
I see people forgetting to hug goodbye
I see people telling themselves they aren't important

all things I've done myself
I just see them now

Forgive all the typos, I don't have energy to find or correct them.

I have had a very good day, feeling the best I have since chemo, and I anticipate it only getting better.

Life ain't easy, it's a job. I won't retire til they make me.

Sunday, June 04, 2006

Pogo


Pogo
Originally uploaded by lynnegr8t.
Coming Soon.

Be on the lookout for a Pogo. Let's keep our fingers crossed that the latest printing will have all the right colors. We are very close, now, and it will be revealed just what Pogo is.

Sunny Sunday

Doing well. I've had 5 mornings in a row with normal glucose (that good old fast before you break it), and this morning, I extended that til the noontime, so I continue to make progress.

I'm still very weak, but feeling better, and hopefully the strength will come as the steroid works its way out, and the glucose numbers continue to regulate.

That's all the news from Lake Wobegone.

Friday, June 02, 2006

Pre-Weekend Blog

I am improving each day, though still recovering from all changes plus chemo. My glucose levels, with insulin, are leveling, and was even in the normal range this morning! I still have a ways to go, and will see my doctor next week. It was suggested I will feel much better in a week after more of the steroid is eliminated from my body.

Send any good thoughts, well-wishes, love, prayers or whatever you use, psyhic energy, any and all positive thoughts my way! I'm soaking them up, and have just found the strength to have some for myself.

xxxooo